


the ice in her eyes

by nevereverever



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Anxiety, Communication, Coping Mechanisms, Drabble, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Post-Canon, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-30
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-09-30 22:21:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17232272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nevereverever/pseuds/nevereverever
Summary: In which Betty and Jughead deal with the consequences of trauma after years have passed





	the ice in her eyes

**Author's Note:**

> I don't watch Riverdale anymore and this is hella old, but it's been burning a hole in my wip document so, have fun.

“You look like you’ve had a day,” Jughead called across their little apartment when he saw her with her too tight ponytail and furrowed brow. She didn't laugh, she didn’t even smile. 

“I’m fine,” she snapped. Her normally warm green eyes were icy when she glanced at him. She dropped her bags and walked into the other room without acknowledging him further. He knew it wasn’t true. He could see it in her face clear as day. But she was wound so tight that he also knew if he went to confront her it would spark a fight. So he waited.

When she emerged her cheeks were streaked with tears, and her hair was still pulled back neatly. She flashed him a smile that was supposed to signal ‘I’m okay’, but just aroused his suspicions further. Her eyes still held that coldness.

“Sorry Jug,” she said as she sat down on the couch, “how was your day?” Another smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes.

“It was normal. Are you okay, Betty?” He sat next to her on the couch and put a hand on her knee. Her therapist called it grounding.

“Yeah. It was a rough day at work, but it’s fine. I’m fine,” she replied. It sounded like she was trying to convince herself. 

He put his hand over hers and watched how she just barely winced. Softly, he curled his hands under her fists.

“No, Jughead, please don’t,” she said, trying to tug her hands away from his, but he held her tight. It was an insistence. Let me be here for you. He carefully unfurled her fingers to find rows of crescent cuts in her palms. They stared out at him, bright red and angry, and he sighed.

“Please don’t be mad at me,” she said, resigned. The ice in her eyes melted, and she just looked tired and scared. She was so scared of herself. Tears started to roll down her face.

“Of course I’m not mad at you. Of course Betts. I’m never mad about this. Just don’t hide from me,” he said, just cradling her hands in his. There was no anger in his voice, no disappointment, just love and pleading and more love. 

“I’m sorry,” she replied, tears streaming down her face. She looked him in the eye and tried to tell him everything in her heart. That she still couldn’t control her darkness all the time, that she was ashamed to make him deal with it, that everything was falling in on her and she needed him. 

He kissed her fingertips, then her wrists, then her forehead. She slumped forward on to him and he put a hand on her back. 

“Nothing to apologize for. We’ll be okay Betts,” he whispered, running his hand up and down her spine, “do you want to talk about it?” She nodded into his chest.

“People at work- they found out about Riverdale. And the Black Hood, my dad. They just wouldn’t stop asking questions Juggie. Daughter of a serial killer is just such an attractive headline.” She put her head in his lap and let her tears fall into his jeans.

“They had this- this look in their eyes like I was broken, and for a second I just wanted to make them hurt. It was just a second,” she said. With every word she said she could feel it creeping back. He knew by now to be holding her hands, so she bit her lip and the darkness receded. 

“Baby, careful,” he said, pulling out her ponytail so he could run his fingers through her hair. It always reminded her to breathe, that she was worthy of not being in pain.

“I don’t want this to be all I am to them Juggie.”

“I need help, tonight,” she said. And then he could breathe.


End file.
